OPEN STATEMENT: TO SINGLE CHURCH MEN

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Let me jet off by saying, I am writing this with love. You mite view it as tough, but its still love. So take what you want from it and leave what you don’t want with me.

Fellaz, if you are age ready for marriage then this is one is for you. But if you are not save it somewhere, you’ll need it one day.

It is not your pastor’s responsibility to teach you about relationships. The first foundations should come from your parents as standard practice in your upbringing. The pastor’s responsibility is to reinforce any godly principles your parents taught you, and to equip you with more. Your parents and the Pastor can’t choose for you either. Stop looking for someone to coach you so that you can copy what they did or said. Monkey see monkey do tactics don’t apply. Be your own men, stand your ground, express your confidence and fight for your beliefs.

Excuse me but I am going to be blunt on this one. So buckle up.

Again it’s not your parents or pastor’s responsibility to teach you how to speak to a lady or even create the opportunity to do so. Its good to spend time praying about it so that you can have a sense of direction, in fact everything starts there. So that ungahambi ubamba uyeka, uthembisa izulu nomhlaba ngapha nangapha. For that matter its not even Heaven’s problem if you are scared or don’t know how to be romantic. Yes, I said it ROMANTIC, because the idea of marriage includes romance. And guess who has to initiate the romance? You sir.

And stop hiding behind your calling! You are not the first in all creation since the foundations of the earth were laid to be single and called in your level. In fact being called is persuasion enough for you to get married, because that calling needs favor, favor only a wife can bring. As called as you are. Do you know that there are places you are NOT being invited to because you are single? Its for your own good. On the same note of calling. Stop using your calling as the standard in which you validate your potential wife. You may be called and she mite not even be bothered like you are about it, because she was created to be your HELP in areas your own eyes don’t even know now. Ask me, I know. In fact ask in any called married men and he will tell how much his wife has protected his calling, and if it wasn’t for her the calling and him would be history.

I feel the time has really come to emancipate our church leaders from this burden. No, our pastor did not teach us how to speak to our sisters in the church. Really? And he won’t. And since when did the sisters in your church become the only women in the Body of Christ? In fact if your pastor had to go the extra mile of teaching you “how to speak”, you should be worried about yourself.  Your pastor didn’t teach you how to read a book, find a job or drive a car andithi? But somehow you figured it out on your own. But with this one, you suddenly need a formula.

Kuyoze kube nini?

There is no formula to proposing to the lady that you know she is the one. There is no written script, which comes with the package of salvation. But only Biblical principles to guide you, so that you start in a godly manner. Thetha nje qha!

Ay’ngeke, truth be told.

Some of the single guys I have met have over stayed the “waiting on the Lord to reveal” season. Now its just an excuse for cold feet. Ngcangcazela usiya mhlekazi! Men up! What do you want? Does the Bible not say speak a thing and it shall be so? Life is moving on, time is not waiting for you to find a perfect day.

Yes, it’s true that men do not age like women. But you do age and you know it. And that will be evident when you have to start playing with your children. I know circumstances are not the same. I know our finances are also not the same. But goals and deadlines do not need any money! They just need your commitment.

While you still have strength work hard, get married, have kids. While you still have the energy to roll on the floor, play in the rain, play doll house and set up toy soldiers. Get married and enjoy life as a married men.

Why do you want to start a family very late in life because of indecision? Heaven is waiting for you to point and not the other way around.

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